Burning Desire
by Cat In My Fridge
Summary: My insides quivered in excitement: I was to have him. Him, the love of my life, the perfect God, my Adonis. When my legs fell apart, so did my soul. To all those who have me on author alert: read it. Just read it. Trust me.


**Burning Desire**

**An erotic Edward/Bella fanfic**

* * *

_He's perfect_, I thought. _Perfect_.

Everybody else thought so, too; Jacob, with his the jealousy rippling at the corners of his lips; the other vampires, none quite as godly as him, who respected him in the way an inferior dog implicitly bowed to its superior; Laura, who I would sometimes catch slicing her eyes over to him with her eyes glittering in the traitorous way that I knew so well because I'd seen it in all those _other _girls. Because yes, of course, there were always girls, so many of them and yet all the same ( _"so handsome, his eyes and his lips and did you see that butt --" "oh my god, Anna, will you believe, he **smiled **at me --")_ --

Well, no, I didn't believe that, because he would smile only for me, and now I was, too, and once I'd started to it was like I couldn't stop, corners of my mouth pulling up up _up _while my hand wandered down down _down _over his chest to the front of his pants.

I loved the way his mouth curled around my name when his zipper screeched open (_"Be _--"), and I wrapped my legs around him, heels digging into his backside (" -- _ll _--"), and pulled him closer ( "-- ah -- _ahh _--").

Then he was kissing me again, wet but passionate, teeth clicking together, the taste of menthol lingering on his tongue; I moaned and buried my hands in the silk-sea of his hair, closer, closer, more, _more_.

"Edward." I broke the kiss, touched his cheeks, let my thumb caress the softly-wielding silk of his lips. He blinked; his velvety lashes splayed against his cheeks like black cracks on a scrimshaw mask, and _oh_, then he was looking at me again, he and his incandessant, _perfect _topaz eyes. And then it really struck me:_ it's him, it's him, it's really him_, _my wonderful beautiful perfect Edward._

When my legs fell open, my heart unlocked right along with them.

And then it all happened very fast. The sound of my own heart beat was thundering in my ears and then _ohhh _he positioned himself, _oh yes, finally . _I could feel the wet flesh brush against my thighs, and a shiver rippled through me and _mmm _my eyes were about to flutter shut. I arched my back and offered myself to him like an altar, for him to take and him to ravish; _his_, eternally his. The back of my hand pressed against my lips shyly, demurely, as I tightened my legs around him, ready to cradle him in my bosom of love and then --

_oh_.

Eyes widened. Slippery fingers dug into bony shoulders. Hearts dropped into stomachs to flutter like so many flocks of birds, and _oh yes, he's inside me, oh yes, Edward, EDWARD -_-

And then he stiffened above me, eyes so wide and so blue, cheeks heating with color like a bed of roses. He opened his mouth, and released a sigh, and with it, a single word:

"Ahhhrghblroooooohgrrrrohhhh."

.

* * *

I blinked.

Watched him twitch above me.

Heard another drawn-out moan rip from his throat.

Then there was silence. There was the sound of clocks ticking and hearts beating, and the sound of time _itself _moaning and aching as it squeezes past, and maybe eons passing and planets dying and coming to life.

Then.

"What," I asked, "the hell," I shoved him away and scooted back, "was _that_?"

Where was my night-long love fest? Where were my sparkly lovemakings that stiched the sky to the earth, accompanied by a wailing Latin chorus with flapping wings and re-aligned the Universe?

"Well, what did you expect?" he exclaimed.

Hell, where were my _unicorns_?!

"What did I _expect_?" I scrambled to my feet, throwing the sheets at him. "Something? _Anything_? Do you think this is what I signed up for when I fell in love with Mr. Tall, Brooding and Glittery?"

My damn _UNICORNS_! I had a right to them! This hadn't been anywhere on the package -- not even in the fine print! (it had something about 'glitter may wash off in the rain', but --)

He scowled. "Bella. I'm a _virgin_. Why, do you expect me to have fallen from the sky as a skillful lover?"

"Edward," I breathed, eyes widening in realization. "I was wrong about us after all."

"No. Bella, p-please, you -- you can't --"

"Oh my. Oh my. Oh, fuck. I-I should have known from the start. _Of course_ you were a virgin," I said, in a 'the sky is blue' kind of way. "Oh, Edward. I should have realized sooner that dating an immortal, handsome, chiselled, clever, witty, toned, tanning-bed basted, waxed, plucked, moisturized, deodorized, perfumed, _perfect_ --"

Edward's chest expanded at that --

"-- 107-year old _virgin _--"

-- and deflated.

"--was a big fucking mistake."

* * *

"Please, tell us what happened," the reporter says, shoving her microphone into the fisherman's face.  
The man nods. "Well, I was jus' -- you know, getting ready to go out and fish when I hear this scream, you know? It was like," the man takes a deep breath, "AHHHRGOOHROOO --"

"Please, sir," the reporter interrupts, "don't exert yourself."

Bella rolls her eyes, reaching into her bag of chips.

"And then, you know, I find this boy, drifting in the water. Terrible sight, that one. Clutching a dagger to his heart --"

"Awful, truly awful," the report ads sympathetically, and the, before the man can say anything else, cuts him off by turning to the camera. "And thus ends the tragedy of this often-overlooked town of Forks in Washington State, where this young teenage boy perished under tragic circumstances. Was it suicide? Was it done out of love? Was he the Romeo pining for his Juliet? The world may never know. Back to you, Bob --"

I groan and switch off the television.

"Tsk. _Loser_."

* * *

Author's Notes: Congrats, you were just the Twilight fandom version of rick-rolled.

:-)

Btw, just so you know, the alternative summary was: "He was magnificient. All the girls loved him; all the boys feared him. He was regal, there was nothing he couldn't do. Bullets? Bitch, please, with his TEETH! He was perfect. And he came in approximately 1.03 seconds. Oh snap."

I decided to be more evil than that, though. Oh well.


End file.
